"If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There's no use being a darn fool about it." - W. C. Fields.
"If you can't beat them, arrange to have them beaten."- George Carlin.
"Then call us Rebels, if you will,
We glory in the name.
For bending under unjust laws
And swearing faith to an unjust cause
We count as greater shame."
- Richmond Daily Dispatch, May 12th, 1862
There. That should tell you more about me than any bio could.